Hear ye! Hear ye! Announcing Lord and Lady Falderal Pipsydoodle

A curious Meebo patron asked me late yesterday afternoon what the order of rank is for nobility in England. I ran (read: walked sedately) to our most current copy of Debrett's Peerage and Baronetage and dove into the most complicated web of genealogical factoids I've ever seen. Debrett's lists everything. I mean everything. Younger sons of Dukes of the Royal Blood come before Marquesses' eldest sons come before Dukes' younger sons... for two pages of teeny-tiny print. The long and short of it is this:

King
Prince
Duke
Marquess
Earl
Viscount
Baron
Baronet
Knight
Esquire
Gentleman

Queen
Princess
Duchess
Marchioness
Countess
Viscountess
Baroness

The fairer sex, as you'll have noticed, comprises its own list. (Think wives of the eldest sons of the younger sons of peers.) Check out this hummer of heraldic code:

If the daughter of a Peer marries a Peer she takes her husband's rank, but if she marries the eldest or younger son of a Peer she ranks either according to her own inherent precedence (i.e., as the daughter of her father), or according to that of her husband (i.e., as the wife of the eldest or younger son of a Duke, Marquess, Earl, etc), whichever happens to be the higher, no matter what the courtesy title may be.

I must confess, I've read that at least three times, and I'm still not exactly certain what they're driving at. I'm grateful the Americans overthrew the British back in the 18th century. Otherwise, I probably would have been beheaded for addressing a Knight of the Garter before a Marquess.
Kidd, Charles, ed. Debrett's Peerage and Baronetage. Richmond, Surrey: Debrett's Limited, 2007. P. 29-30. Print.